It's the Small Things That Matters

At the end of the day I asked her, "What was your favorite thing today?" The answer I got was not what I had expected.

A few weeks ago it was my wife's birthday. We both could not take the day off from each of our employment so yes, we went to work that day. To be quite honest, I was still asleep when my wife left. I do remember though that she came into our bedroom, woke me up and said, "I'm leaving for work..."

As usual I just rolled over, we said our prayer for the day and off she went. All I said was, "drive safe."

What did I do next?..

I went straight back to bed.

When I woke up to get ready for the day, I remembered that it was her birthday. I have missed the chance of saying happy birthday to her in the morning so I sent her a text message. 

Just a few seconds from sending the text, my phone rang. It was my wife. I can see her smiling from the other end of the call via her voice. She said, "Thank you... I came in this morning to see if you'll say happy birthday and you didn't but since you sent me this text you're forgiven."

Honestly, from a guy's perspective, I don't see what the big deal is with this greeted with happy birthday first thing in the morning is but, here we are and I've got to play along somehow. 

If you haven't figured it out by now, yes... I forgot to plan for the birthday.

Also yes... I might lose some points if she's ever going to read this but we live and learn.

During the day I texted her and asked that she would pick a restaurant for dinner tonight.

I went to the store to get her flowers and I originally planned on buying wrapped flowers but I saw some orchid there. So I got her a purple orchid instead. I went around the corner to the chocolate isle to get some chocolate. I tell you, it was a hard decision to make. For a moment, I thought I kind of understood what some women felt like when deciding on what to wear for the day as they stand looking at their closets.

I also bought a gift bag, some birthday wrapping papers, and a few gifts as well. The last item I got was a happy birthday card. I walked out of that store feeling accomplished.

As I got back into the office I wrapped the base of the orchid with some gold colored paper. I wrapped the chocolates with the birthday wrapping papers. I put together the gifts in the gift bag and just as I was about to slide in the card I thought maybe I should write something on it. 

Just the fact that I originally thought of just putting in the card without writing something on it tells you how shallow I am but... this is not about me so let's stay focused here.

#movingalong

The exact words I wrote were for her alone and she'll share it with whomever she pleases. For the sake of this blog I'll just give a little summary. 

I told her how grateful I am that I made the decision of marrying her. That even after all these years we've been together and all the changes and trials that have come our way. If I were to go back in time and have to choose with all the knowledge of what I know now, I will still choose her. Because of that, I am grateful that she was born this particular day and have got a chance of convincing her to be my wife.

After that, I was done with the gift and in went the card to the envelope.

When we saw each other after work, I gave her her presents. She went through everything and got to the card. She teared up after reading it and my heart just fell. I felt very accomplished again.

We went to the restaurant of her choice and dinner was on point.

Everything fell in place that day. 

When we were in bed and about to go to sleep. I asked her...

What was your favorite thing today?

"The card," she said. She said that out of all her presents and treats, the card was what she like most.

I laid there thinking, of all the things we did, what she treasured most was the note that I almost didn't write because in my mind and as a husband I thought the words I wrote down were a given. I assumed that she know how I felt about her.

That night I saw a glimpse to how my wife saw things and how she weighs our lives as a family as well as spouses.

I thought it was unique that out of all the money spent that day. Out of all the treats and gifts, what she treasured most were those few lines.

As men, we tend to assume a lot of things regarding what our spouses think and know. I would argue on the contrary.

Tell your spouses or significant other that you love them. Let them know why you love them. Let them know that you don't regret the decision you've made of being with them. Let them know that if you were to go back in time knowing all the things you know now that you would still choose them. Assure them that though things have change in life (like looks, age, and so forth)... you would still choose them.

Of all the money you can spend buying all sorts of gifts, I can assure you that our spouses value our support and loving words/thoughts more than anything your wallet can afford.